Blog Post Number 5: "E.T. H8s Humans" (Conspiracy)

      "Hi, everyone. I'm Olaf. And I like warm hugs!" Just kidding. My name is not Olaf, it's A.J., and I don't like warm hugs (usually). Chris made me co-owner of his blog. I'm the conspiracy guy, so you'll see lots of government/alien things from me. All right, for today:

                                                     "E.T. H8s Humans" (Conspiracy)
      For decades, many people have believed that they have had close encounters of the third kind with the outer-space beings we call extraterrestrials. Namely, being abducted by these aliens. Their minds are convinced that their bodies have been probed by these little green men, anorexic gray things, arthropodic space creatures, humanoid reptiles, whatever. The point is, none of this has actually happened. All human-alien abduction stories are fabricated by one of two things:
1. For any or no reason at all, going into regression hypnosis. This is known to fabricate memories and therefore reveal falsehoods about your past. Hard to believe the guys who do this are still in business.
2. Experiencing a concussion of any degree around the time you saw the spaceship. Brain damage, even the smallest amount, can do CRAZY things to your memory.
      Extraterrestrials of any form are not interested at all in the human race. They view humans as self-centered and ignorant (which is unfortunately mostly true), or, like the radicals who believe in them, just plain crazy. Either way, the human mind is too closed for them to operate on. The resources they ARE interested in would be our oil/natural gas reserves, uranium deposits, and some higher-food-web animals (such as tigers), which is why some animals are considered to be "extinct" or "endangered".

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